Return To The Ouija 2022

You work at your job for too long, you get comfortable, and eventually, your professionalism becomes relaxed.

Then you and your cohorts devolve into doing stupid shit. As usual, we closed the store down, cleaned up, and had more than some time to spare. Someone, and it might have been me for all I know, suggested we uniquely play the ouija board. We have Jordan, the newest employee, sit in the swivel chair so that he can be the planchette. The twenty-six other employees would be the letters, and the three trash pails would be 'yes, 'no,' and 'goodbye.' Troy and I would be the two guys who put our hands on Jordan's head, preparing to ask questions. What surprised me more than the game's uniqueness was how willing everyone was to do it. There was no resistance from any of the participants. We all took three slow, deep cleansing breaths, and as Troy and I placed our hands on Jordan's head and prepared to ask the first question, Jordan adjusted himself for a second and laughed nervously while settling himself on the swivel chair. He checked to ensure that he was secured and wouldn't fall off. "Ok, I'm good," Jordan looked up and nodded to the both of us. A second later, Jordan, and the chair he was sitting in, shot off across the office floor like he and it had been hit by a hockey stick. Jordan crashed through the thick glass window with such force that he landed and skidded across the length of the parking lot. Jordan Pang was cut up very badly and died from shock because of severe blood loss. The store closed down not long after because it developed a bad reputation for being haunted. We had to destroy the security tapes and lie about how Jordan died and why. Several businesses have opened in that same place, and none stayed around for too long. Last I checked, it was two different pizza restaurants; I don't know what's there today. Maybe a bank? I'm not sure. I'm at a new place now, known for its coffee.

At last count, we have twenty-six employees total. Let's see if I can get it right this time? There is an employee Christmas party coming up.

photo credit: Daily Mail