WAHI: MAUNAWILI
She'd done everything for me; some of it served me well, most of it crippled me in the way that I grew up not knowing how to do the common everyday basic things for myself. She did teach me about the value of prayer and faith. As a child, when I was close to death on many occasions, she was a constant presence at my bedside. Her prayers never ceased until I was better. It would have a long-reaching effect well into my adult years. Overall, I survived.
She began to hallucinate a month ago, she claimed that all her deceased relatives were coming to see her, not so much to tell her that her time was soon coming, but to help her make amends. She said her sister, whom she had not spoken to up until the time of her passing, materialized before her and asked for forgiveness. She'd cursed my mother over a man she felt was rightfully hers. The curse never took, and it was she, my mother's sister, who ultimately suffered from her own sorcery. Her sister faded into nothing and was then released. She claimed later that the ghost of her uncle appeared and begged for forgiveness for beating her over a stolen watch, which he claimed that my mother had taken when she was a little girl. She forgave him, and he faded into nothing and was released.
My mother's first husband, Catito, appeared at the side of her bed and begged for forgiveness for having a child with her and not taking responsibility. He left her to raise my sister Rose all by herself.
"You should see her," my mother said. "She looks just like you."
She forgave him, and Catito disappeared and was released.
My mother hallucinated that many more deceased spirits appeared to her to beg for her forgiveness. For each one, she released them of their burden and set them free. Some came with necessary transgressions to be let go of; others were minor and were born from a misunderstanding or a miscommunication. Whether real or imagined, each one drained my mother of her energy further and further. Toward the end of the month, she'd nearly exhausted her last ounce of compassion on the ghost of a young Portuguese girl named, 'Yvonne.'
Her father kicked her out of the house when he found out that she had gotten pregnant out of wedlock. My mother saw her through her pregnancy, and right up to the moment she gave birth. Yvonne promised my mother that should the baby be a girl, she would name the child after her, Rosemarie. When Yvonne gave birth, it was a girl. A short time later, the child's father appeared and promised the young girl that he would find a job and take care of both of them. Having never kept her promise to my mother, the girl left with her child's father. Less than a month later, Yvonne and her infant were found dead in their Makiki apartment, both brutally beaten to death. She appeared at my mother's bedside on her knees, asking for forgiveness for not keeping her promise.
"You must forgive yourself," my mother's gentle voice replied. "You let your heart rule your head, and it cost you, the life of your child, and that of your own."
Yvonne could not forgive herself and remained earthbound.
~
The morning that I came to see her, she was fast asleep, snoring with her mouth wide open. Somethings never change. I roused her by gently shaking the bed, her eyes flew open, and she sat up quickly. Once she was able to orient herself, she looked at me with bleary eyes. "I almost gave up that you were ever going to show up at all."
"I'm sorry it took me so long, ma," I smiled. "I'm here now. Is there anything you want me to do?"
"No," she waved me off. "Don't touch anything cause every time you put it back the wrong way. Come sit down," she patted the space next to her on her bed. "I have to tell you something."
Begrudgingly, I sat, not wanting to be in that space where her final moment could come at any time. "I want you to forgive me," she said.
"For what?" I answered. What wrong had she ever done me that she needs my absolution?
"For raising you the wrong way," she said. "I spoiled you too much."
"I don't think so," I shrugged my shoulders.
"Look at you," she glared at me with her discerning eyes. "You still can't do certain things for yourself, that's my fault."
"I don't understand, Ma," I was confused.
"I knew you wouldn't," she replied and held out her arms to me." Come, let me hug you."
I leaned forward and inhaled her perfume while she hugged me tightly, "I love you, my son, do you forgive me?"
Not sure as to what she really wanted to be forgiven for, I replied, "I forgive you, mom, and I love you."
That's when I heard the ringing and pinging of wind chimes. Its tubular chorus was beautiful, and it filled the entire room. I began to see sparkling lights in front of me, and I inhaled the pungent aroma of burnt sulfur. My mother began to appear as a clear still pond that was suddenly disturbed by the hand of a child who vigorously stirred the waters. "I love you, son," she said again. "Thank you for your forgiveness."
Those were my mother's last words to me, after, I was released from my bonds to the earth, and everything that lived and breathes on it, and I went to the realm of my ancestors.
Four years ago, I was challenged by my wife to write a story a day from July to October 31st. That made 100 ghost stories. I have now completed 400 Halloween ghost stories, thanks to my wife Tanya, and thanks to all of you. As you know, this is not the end of my writing and channeling stories. Subscribe to this blog so that you can see alerts whenever I post something new!
Mahalo
Lopaka & Tanya
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